This is a story full of colons.  Prepare yourself.  It’s not my prettiest work.

If you follow me on Instagram, this isn’t new information to you.  But as we end National Adoption Awareness Month, here are some thoughts:

This is an interesting month.  For decades, adoptive parents have been the voices sought after for adoption awareness.  It’s a prettier, cleaner story.  Everyone loves a happy ending.

In recent years, the voices of adoptees are now rising to tell us that adoption isn’t simply “a happy ending”.

Adoption is a beautiful response to a heart-wrenching tragedy.  Every adoption story begins with loss.  

I know this.   I believe this.

I also believe:  Every child deserves a forever family.

And I know:  My son’s story is his own, and I want to honor it as he grows up.

And I am compelled to say:  I can’t imagine my world without him, even as I know the loss of his birth family and culture are significant.

And now to steal from my exact Instagram post:

A belated national adoption day post, but: we could have missed this. If you have a heart for adoption, don’t let fear stop you. Yes, it might be hard at times. All the best things in life are hard sometimes. Love is hard sometimes. All three of my children have been expensive and time-consuming and added wrinkles and sleep deprivation to our lives. All three have brought us to the limits of our capacity and straight to the ear of God as we seek wisdom and strength beyond our own. Adoption is another path to parenthood, and parenthood of any sort stretches you. Yet. All three have also added more joy and laughter and love and wonder and magic than could ever be quantified. It feels too small to say Sam is a gift and a blessing. He is our son. He is our heart walking around on unsteady feet. He is a brother and friend and a vital part of our family’s dna even if he doesn’t share our biological dna. He is loved beyond measure.

Adoption is hard at times. Don’t be afraid of doing hard things. Embrace hard things that require you to love more. They are worth it.